Self-training is something that every single person applies during their entire life, at all levels of existence.
We start to self-train from the moment we are born.
But, as we grow up, our needs for various skills become bigger, more complicated and require more engagement at learning. Learning offered by organized schooling often is not enough to achieve results in tasks that life puts in front of us. Therefore we are forced to find our own ways to improve skills in order to make our life easier, more beautiful and more successful.
The ultimate goal of every communication is understanding i.e. better comprehension of something, starting with the person we talk to, to the smallest details that are the subject of conversation.
In which way can we practice by ourselves?
1. Extraversion and introversion
Every person is by their nature either extrovert or introvert. We cannot change our nature, but we can practice how to take over different roles when necessary. In communication both positions are required.
Extroversion is necessary when we talk, provide evidence or explain attitudes, perform a presentation of something etc.
Introversion is necessary during the preparation, during selection and devising appearances or negotiation strategies, as well as in later analysis, drawing conclusions and making decisions.
These two extremes need to be well balanced. It is necessary that people who are by nature more extroverted, often put themselves in the "background" and train to be attentive listeners, trying to understand others better and get accustomed more easily with one's position. Introverted should use every opportunity to take a word and practice to speak longer and louder.
2. Integration of mind, emotions and body
The dominant level of functioning for most people is mental, while ignoring emotions and bodily sensations. We need to practice in order for our mind, emotions and their expression to always be well harmonized. Rashness and lack of strategy in achieving this harmony can lead us to making wrong decisions.
3. Willingness to cope with crisis in relationships
Human relationships are unstable category and depend on many factors. Some of them do not depend solely on us. Therefore, we must be prepared for changes in relations and build our position in such way that it depends less on others. And of course, we should always have a plan B - and know how to manage conflicts.
Communication, building relationships, achieving trust and friendship is usually a long and slow process. No need to rush. A successful person should have their own "private circle" developed with enough good relations and friends in it, in order not to feel chronic "hunger" for closeness and creating new friendships.
Everyone wants to be right. If we are aware of that, we'll give the other person a chance to take the lead in a conversation and we will not impose our views. We will also be open to criticism. It shows a willingness to compromise.
6. Complete the communication cycles
Reply to mail. Confirm receipt of one's shipment. Give feedback to the person who expects it. Sometimes it is necessary to diplomatically avoid an answer or ignore something that you are not interested in.
Anyone can do it
From all this it can be concluded that we ourselves can do a lot to improve our skills in communication. That takes a lot of persistent practicing, but it will be worth it tenfold.